Back in the Saddle

Let me preface this by saying that I am absurdly lucky. Insanely, wonderfully, marvelously lucky. Two years ago last May Charlie and I were in the airport and we were talking about life and the future and he said, "so why don't you quit your job? It's ok." He was telling this to a woman that had worked nonstop since age 18. Worked for herself, worked to support a crappy ex-husband, worked to survive. I remember living in West Virginia and eating nothing but rice for months. I tried to hold off scurvy by sneaking glasses of orange juice at my job.

Let's just say that work was a part of the fabric of my life. And the work I was doing at the time of this airport conversation was, well, a little stressful. The other day my friend was trying to gently tell me what I was like during those Amazon days and it was something close to "crazy bitch." I knew I was not the most pleasant of people, but I kept bringing home the bacon because I expected that of myself. Responsibility incarnate.

So when Charlie said "why don't you quit" I did what came naturally. I burst into tears, and then I returned to work. And gave my two week notice. I only remember a surreal blur, but suddenly it was my last day and I was free. And for the past two years I've spent my time blissfully sewing, baking bread, making jam, painting walls, pressure washing and refinishing decks, remodeling bathrooms, and a million other thing. You know, Fun things!

And I confess, waiting for my new career to start. Every month I spit-and-shine up my resume and submit it for the job of "mom" and I get rejected. I've been waiting, and waiting, and in my spare time doing all of that bread and painting and landscaping.

Well, it's been a few years and I'm still waiting for that permanent job offer. A couple of weeks ago I pulled out my old admin resume and sent it out. Instant replies! To ease back into the world of working I picked a temp agency that would place me somewhere I would fit in (and have a short commute). This morning I started my 6 month temp placement at microsoft and it was natural and strange at the same time. I was pulled into a meeting upon arrival and heard people saying things like "action items" and "take this offline" and I almost laughed out loud. Oh, sweet sweet perspective.

For the next few months I'll be trading my lunches at the pancake house, dandling favorite babies on my knee, trips to flower world, and various home improvements for a paycheck. But I know how lucky I was to have my two-year vacation, and also know that if I really needed to I could go back to it tomorrow. So Charlie, thank you for the vacation. And my friends, thank you for making me see how sweet the time I spend with you really is (now that I have less of it!).

And to my fertility clinic, who obviously went with the auto-wording that came with their payment machine. Really, when printing my receipt you should maybe NOT point out that you want to see me again! :) I found this old receipt the other day and it made me laugh out loud.

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Eggs laid in the coop today: 2
Eggs found in the woods today: 2
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Eggs laid in the coop Sunday: 1
Eggs found in the woods Sunday: 0
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Eggs laid in the coop Saturday: 1
Eggs found in the woods Saturday: 0